Something I think a lot about these days is academia. That is....leaving it, being done with school forever. At least for a while. Most people assume that if you get a Ph.D. you will become a professor. However, I knew from the moment I applied to doctoral programs that I wanted to expand my options and make myself more marketable for the kind of international job I dreamed of. But once I started, I quickly learned that I was being apprenticed for a research position. As I began to feel more and more like a fish out of water, I stumbled upon some things that helped me feel better: (1) the book Mama, PhD is an anthology of personal stories from women who have experienced academia and motherhood and the inherent tension between the two spheres; (2) the blog Leaving Academia is full of insights about the turbulent emotions doctoral students and faculty face when considering employment outside of the academy; (3) the fact that my husband is ABD and I feel such a kinship with a history Ph.D. studying to become a digital archivist.
So, as expected, at the Society of American Archivists meeting everyone wanted to know what I am up to, including the dean of my school and my advisor. I shrugged and told them what I have been saying for a year and then cursed the fact that I still do not know anything which makes me look so darn unprofessional. Oh well...*sigh*... at least I am learning that my self worth is not based on my education or job status!
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